Nine years in pow’r for Tony Blair
Has had effect upon his hair.
All whisp’ry grey, his face is stressed,
He’s stepping down, he needs a rest.
His fake tan can no longer hide
Wrinkles and worry lines so wide.
It’s been a stressful time in power –
Decisions have at times turned sour.
Sidling with Bush over Iraq,
He lost respect he’ll never get back.
But do not worry, do not frown –
The next PM could be Gordon Brown.

All could be a diff’rent story,
Depending on our brave new Tory.
Howard stood aside, Dave came in,
At first no-one thought he could win.
But he made his speech without notes
And this seemed to win him the votes.
With his underpants’ style revealed,
His leadership was signed and sealed.
An MP for only four years,
He’s full of hope and has no fears.
At 39, youth’s on his side.
He’s ready for a long old ride.

He beat off Davis, Fox and Clarke
And now wants to assert his mark.
Nearly related to the Queen,
His policies are going green.
He’s built a wind farm on his roof,
He bikes to work as living proof.
His motto is to ‘Keep it real’.
(We’ve heard it before some might feel.)
David claims the party will change
And soon appeal to a wider range.
They’ll re-emerge from that sinking.
Now they’re thinking what we’re thinking.

The Lib Dems turned melancholic –
They learned Charles was alcoholic.
The threats to quit, amid the snarls,
Saw the end of the reign of Charles.
Oaten named himself as leader.
Turned out he was rentboy breeder.
Chris Huhne is rated number one –
A new MP jumping the gun?
He knows what he would need to do,
But many aren’t convinced – Chris Who?
The new idea of low’ring tax
Sounds good, but leaves a hole of stacks.

Would Campbell be a better bet?
He’s acting leader and true vet.
A former sprinter in his day,
Can Ming take it all the way?
If he can get it in the bag,
He’s willing to ditch his prize jag.
The other man the Dems could choose
Is outsider Simon Hughes.
He’s to the left of many his peers.
Bisexual, he receives some jeers.
He wants Britain free, fair and green.
If he wins remains to be seen.

The back biting and name calling
Cameron thinks is appalling.
To prove himself all meek and mild,
He calls chief whip a ‘screaming child’.
Like children, all MPs when booing,
Cheering, gloating, jeering, cooing.
And among the pleasant chit chat
It’s no strange coincidence that
‘The right honourable gentleman’,
When letters rearranged, can
Make ‘I loathe the bugger a lot’.
The true meaning we have now got.

So when the next election comes,
Will we vote for Dave and chums?
Will Brown be the new colour black?
Will the Lib Dems come fighting back?
Will all policies be the same,
Just diff’rent words and a diff’rent name?
If we quote what Cameron said,
‘Our best days lie ahead.’
He wants dignity in old age
And decent jobs with a good wage.
Pay attention, it’s important we care.
Who shall we choose as heir to Blair?